My friend Michelle, a retired school teacher and youth group leader, lives to know God and help others know Him too, in every possible way. Come along with her to get a delightful glimpse of how a group of noisy teens got quiet enough to know God better, once upon a bonfire.
Hi, I’m Michelle. Are you familiar with the discipline of examen? (uhg –za -muhn) This Christian practice teaches us how to discern the presence of God in the flow of daily life. That’s why I like to use it with teens and young adults.
There’s just one problem. Reflection requires silence, which teens and young adults do not readily seek on their own. However, when seasoned adults provide a quiet space and specific directions about how to seek God in it, youth and young adults often fly like baby birds who have just discovered their wings.
Several years ago, I coordinated our church’s youth retreat. We lodged in a retreat center far from civilization that offered wide open spaces and an assortment of activities. Three times a day the kids were tuned-in as the dynamic speaker shared about our identity in Christ.
Between the talks, the students met in breakout sessions, journaled, and prayed. When they had free time, they formed groups and played various games, all with a lot of yelling and laughing. Let’s just say, the retreat center was loud and bustling.
On the last night of the retreat, we gathered around a campfire to sing praise songs and share stories. As usual, the kids were loud and boisterous, but that was about to change. I don’t remember what I said or what Scripture passage I referred to. Perhaps it was Psalm 8, verses 3 and 4. All I know is that the kids were open to whatever came next.
“When I look at your heavens, the work of your fingers, the moon and the stars, which you have set in place, what is man that you are mindful of him, and the son of man that you care for him?” Psalm 8: 3, 4
The sky was full of stars, and the moon was bright. It was the perfect evening for the kids to commune with God—quietly and on their own. They responded with eager interest when I invited them to quietly and slowly walk with God. I suggested they share their favorite weekend memories with him, and let him know their deepest worries or concerns.
About ten minutes into the activity, Grace came running up to me. “Miss Michelle,” she said hesitantly, “I felt something.”
“What did you feel?” I asked.
“I’m not sure,” Grace responded. “I was talking to God, and all of a sudden, I felt this warmth around me. It was so peaceful. It was weird.”
“It was the Holy Spirit,” I offered, and Grace started to cry tears of joy. She was overwhelmed. I hugged her, and we prayed together.
Later, when everyone reconvened around the campfire, the tone was different, contemplative and joyful. Grace shared her story, which prompted several other students to relay similar experiences. I sat in amazement listening to how active the Holy Spirit had been in the space we provided.
Since that night, I have worked examen into many lessons with high schoolers, college students, and young adults. In fact, my church now closes their 48-hour confirmation retreat with examen. Ninth and tenth graders spread out in the sanctuary at 9:00 pm on a Friday night to reflect on what they’ve learned, to thank God for what he has planned for their lives, and to ask Him for clarity and direction going forward. Without exception, when we ask the students to name their favorite part of the confirmation retreat, quiet time with God always tops the list.
Keep Listening, Michelle
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I asked Michelle if I could also tell you about her book, Are You Listening? Though Grace’s story isn’t in it, all of the stories—some her own and some not her own—are chalk full of cheery, true, encouragement for you to grow closer to the Lord and to each other.